7 Calming Strategies For BPD.




These calming strategies are used depending on what mood you’re in.

What you could do to get through it?

  1. Angry, frustrated, restless
  • rip up a newspaper
  • hit a pillow
  • throw ice cubes into the bath so they smash
  • do some vigorous exercise
  • listen to loud music
  • do a practical activity like gardening or woodwork.

2. Depressed, sad, lonely

  • wrap up in a blanket and watch your favourite tv show
  • write all your negative feelings on a piece of paper and tear it up
  • listen to a song or piece of music you find uplifting
  • write a comforting letter to the part of yourself that is feeling sad or alone
  • cuddle a pet or a soft toy.

3. Anxious, panicky, tense

  • make yourself a hot drink and drink it slowly, noticing the taste and smell, the shape of the mug and its weight in your hand
  • take ten deep breaths, counting each one out loud
  • write down everything you can think of about where you are right now, such as the time, date, colour of the walls and the furniture in the room
  • take a warm bath or shower – this can help change your mood by creating a soothing atmosphere and a distracting physical sensation.

4. Dissociative, spaced out


  • chew a piece of ginger or chili
  • clap your hands and notice the stinging sensation
  • drink a glass of ice cold water.

5. Want to self-harm

  • rub ice over where you want to hurt yourself
  • stick sellotape or a plaster on your skin and peel it off
  • take a cold bath.

6. Keep a mood diary

Recording your moods in a diary could help you spot patterns in what triggers difficult experiences for you, or notice early signs that they are beginning to happen.

You could also make a note of what’s going well. It’s really important to be kind to yourself and recognize difficult steps you’ve taken, or new things you’ve tried.

7. Make a self-care box

You could put together some things that might help you when you’re struggling – a bit like making a first-aid kit for your mental health.

For example:

  • favourite books, films or CDs
  • a stress ball or fiddle toy
  • helpful sayings or notes of encouragement
  • pictures or photos you find comforting
  • a soft blanket or cosy slippers
  • a nice-smelling candle or lavender bag.

please note that this list of strategies most centered on BPD.

Published by Coach Amy

BS, Psychology graduate, Certified NLP Master Practitioner, Certified Life Coach, training in Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT) Certified Confidence Life Coach,

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